Thanksgiving and Vatican Conference Reflections: My Report from Rome

Thanksgiving is a good symbol of the three day Vatican Conference I attended last week. Thanksgiving is the one holiday that all can enjoy no matter what faith we have. People travel great distances just to be together on that day, and the dinner table is famous for having all kinds of different people at it, young, old, liberal, conservative, parents, children …and even that crazy relative!. As different as we all are from each other, we sit together for a meal of thanksgiving.

The official title of the Vatican conference was “The Complementarity of Man and Woman.” All of the talks referenced the idea that “male” and “female” are very different ways of being from each other but that each is meant to compliment or bring their unique characteristics together in a harmony that forms the basic unit of humanity called marriage and the family. Sounds like what Thanksgiving does as well.

It was an international and inter-religious gathering of about 200 significant religious leaders from 14 different faiths. There were many famous scholars and authors there as well. I was there as a Visiting Fellow of Notre Dame University. (I felt lucky, and quite unworthy, to be among these famous people!)

The Vatican saw it as a follow up meeting to the Synod on the Family that was held in early October. That Synod began a yearlong open and transparent discussion by Catholics everywhere on a variety of issues that families face today. The Church wants everyone to consider how best to strengthen families as well as provide help to those families that struggle. Pope Francis also welcomed discussion about how best to help those in second marriages, how to understand the reception of communion, and those with same sex attraction. These are serious and important issues. No wonder he set aside a whole year!

Pope Francis opened our conference with a moving talk on how families are the “school” where we learn about love and especially reconciliation. Throughout each day, senior religious leaders from the Southern Baptist Convention, Islam, Hindu, Buddhist, Jewish, and other traditions gave presentations on how their tradition understands marriage and the family.

I am sure that many of the non-Catholic participants never thought they would one day be invited guests to the Vatican! It was especially moving when Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, most recently the Chief Rabbi of the British Commonwealth, Rick Warren, the pastor of Saddleback Community Church, and, of course, the Pope, all received rousing standing ovations.

While the talks were fairly formal, there were two 30 minute breaks during the day and a 90 minute lunch, all designed to encourage friendly mingling and informal discussion of the topics just heard.

One of the most interesting to me (as a son of a scientist) was highly technical presentation by a psychiatrist, Dr. Aaron Kheriaty, from UC Irvine on the latest research on the difference between sexual identity and orientation. The research indicates that while sexual orientation can be rather fluid, especially in young people, and is not always stable, sexual identity is actually more fixed and stable. In other words, being male or female is a stable feature of humanity by far while sexual orientation is not. That is a distinction I had thought of before but the research seems fairly robust. I will write more about this in future articles.

While none of the other religions has a “Pope” who is the official spokesperson of their faith, the similarity of ideas seemed to affirm that marriage and families are international and inter-religious features of what it means to be a human person. From this common understanding of people of all faiths and cultures, our own yearlong process to strengthen family life continues. It should end just before next year’s Thanksgiving Holiday …perfect timing.

(In the audience picture, I am seated in the fifth row towards the right of the picture. The cameraman caught me getting ready to take the Pope’s picture).

God Bless!

Fr. Dave